That's me in the corner... That's me in the spotlight...: Blog

Spades, Clubs, Diamonds, ...

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 18:30:02 GMT

Another lesson from music...

For me... and for You...

Words of the day:

"He deals the cards as a meditation
And, those he plays never suspect
He doesn't play for the money he wins
He doesn't play for respect

He deals the cards to find the answer
The sacred geometry of chance
The hidden law of a probable outcome
The numbers lead a dance

I know that the Spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the Clubs are weapons of war
I know that Diamonds mean money for this Art
But, that's not the shape of my heart

He may play the Jack of Diamonds
He may lay the Queen of Spades
He may conceal a King in his hand

While the memory of it fades

I know that the Spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the Clubs are weapons of war
I know that Diamonds mean money for this Art
But, that's not the shape of my heart

That's not the shape - the shape of my heart

And, if I told you that I loved you
You'd maybe think there's something wrong
I'm not a man of too many faces
The mask I wear is one

For those who speak know nothing
And find out to their cost
Like those who curse their luck in too many places
And, those who fear are lost

I know that the Spades are the swords of a soldier
I know that the Clubs are weapons of war
I know that Diamonds mean money for this Art
But, that's not the shape of my heart

That's not the shape of my heart
That's not the shape - the shape of my heart"

(Sting, Shape Of My Heart, Ten Summoner's Tales)

White flag...

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 10:42:02 GMT

I don't know why I'm still here, I don't know if I want to say some more about me...

I'm tired to fight...

To fight with this world that is gioing in the wrong direction... Or maybe is not this world... maybe I'm wrong, and it's my life that is going in the wrong way...

There are too many things changing in me...

Soon my brand new home will be completed...

I hope it will be a good starting point (even if I'm not so sure) to feel better...

But there is one big thing that is still missing... I'm still incomplete... I cannot free up my mind and I'm not so sure if I'm strong enough...

Love is killing me... I'm giving all my life to make people happy, but, what about me?

I feel empty... And I can't find the missing pieces of this puzzle...

I'm suffering, maybe a radical change is necessary, but in this moment I can't see through the haze around me and I lost the direction...

I decided to face this alone to avoid to put my sorrow on the people I love...

But I have to recognize that I put a big wall around me...

Maybe, I have only to convince myself that it doesn't worth to love...

cya

Words of the day:

"Outside the dawn is breaking,
But inside in the dark I'm aching to be free!"

(Queen, The Show Must Go On, Innuendo)

One year of Blog....

Thu, 01 May 2008 06:47:15 GMT

One Year ago...

I decided to start this new adventure...

I promised myself to put part of my feelings and part of my life on this white pages...

Many things happend in this year...

But I'm still here, looking for that lost way... Fighting everyday with myself...

I'm one year older, I hope to be also wiser than yesterday...

Thanks to my few readers, thanks to all the people I love...

Thanks to You... my hidden Love...

Words of the day:

"(Why don't you let me make) a brand new start..."

(Queen, Let Me Live, Made In Heaven)

Waiting for an answer...

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 15:00:49 GMT

It's still time to wait...

Waiting is hard...

Waiting is difficult...

Silence is calm...

Silence is peace...

Silence is gold...

Let's pray...

Let's open the heart again...

Let's continue this fight...

It's hard, and sometimes I would like to surrender...

But not now, not again, not today...

Probably, I will have to ask someone's help...

Words of the day:

"...Can music save your mortal soul,
And can you teach me how to dance real slow?"

(Don McLean, American Pie)

Confusion...

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 15:49:20 GMT

The scenario is changing...

Words are tired...

Heart aches...

Many doubts again...

I'm not sure if I could face You..

Maybe I'm not ready...

I'm looking, seaching, sinking...

Maybe that day will come...

But when? How long should I wait?

Words of the day:

"I guess I'm wastin' time but I've got to clear my mind
I don't know why I love you but I do"

(Clarence 'Frogman' Henry, (I Don't Know Why I Love You) But I Do)

Searching for...

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 08:57:50 GMT

Just few words after long time without hearing my voice...

I'm searching, trying to find the way... The way I lost time ago...

And today is the most important waiting day... The day of silence, the day on which we are waiting for the new life... for the resurrection... for a rebirth.

Happy Easter to all of you!

Words of the day:

"Why do you seek the living one among the dead?"

(Luke 24, 5)

Singing alone...

Fri, 15 Feb 2008 16:18:25 GMT

Let the music speaks for me...

Words of the day:

"The rain came down
The rain came down
The rain came down on me.

The wind blew strong
The summer song
Fades to memory

I knew you when
I loved you then
The summers young and helpless.

You laid me bare
You marked me there
The promises we made.

I used to think
As birds take wing
They sing through life so why can't we?
You cling to this
You claim your best
If this is what you're offering
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain.

The nighttime creases
Summer schemes
And stretches out to stay.
The sun shines down
You came around
You love easy days.

But now the sun,
The winters come.
I wanted just to say
That if I hold
I'd hope youd fold
Open up inside, inside of me.

I used to think
As birds take wing
They sing through life so why can't we?
You cling to this
You claim your best
If this is what you're offering
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain.

This winter song
I'll sing along
I've searched its still refrain
I'll walk alone
I've given this, take wing
Celebrate the rain.

I used to think
As birds take wing
They sing through life so why can't we?
You cling to this
You claim your best
If this is what you're offering
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain
I'll take the rain".

(R.E.M., I'll Take The Rain, Reveal)

To everything there is a season...

Thu, 07 Feb 2008 10:41:03 GMT

I will take a break for a while...
I will come back one day...
I don't know when....

If You want You can wait for me, or, if You prefer, You can leave me...

cya

Words of the day:

"...A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time to love, a time to hate
A time for peace, I swear its not too late..."

(Byrds, Turn! Turn! Turn!)

Will you ever welcome me?

Tue, 15 Jan 2008 12:28:29 GMT

Long time away...

Only to find the direction...

Silence that speaks more than words...

Time wasted in searching...

Another heartbreak...

Green fields of grass...

Another minute lost...

I wish I were happy...

Not alone, but with You...

Words of the day:

"It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you... Gonna take some time to do the things we never had..."

(Toto, Africa)

The wise man built his words upon the rocks...

Sat, 29 Dec 2007 10:57:57 GMT

I'm sorry if I think I love You...

I can't remove You from my mind...

Even if You're far...

Even if You are not here with me...

Even if this will be an impossible dream...

I will try to follow my heart....

I will continue to be myself...

I will try to make You always happy...

I will continue to fight for You...

I will continue to look for You secretely...

I will continue to sing...

Maybe one day...

Words of the day:

"...These rivers of suggestion are driving me away..."

(R.E.M., So Central Rain, Reckoning)

Don't forget...

Mon, 24 Dec 2007 15:54:58 GMT

A small post to wish you all a Merry Christmas for tomorrow...

Please, don't forget the real sense of this day...

Don't be in hurry for all the gifts you have to buy...

Forget the noise of the commercial centers...

Stop yourself... and start thinking!

This day is the day in which we remember the birth of a Child...

I would like to "re-born" with Him today...

Merry Christmas, dear readers.

Words of the day:

"...I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree..."

(Mariah Carey, All I Want For Christmas Is You)

Remembering that night...

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 07:18:00 GMT

I Don' t want to say so much...

I remember that dance floor...

The music running through my veins...

...This broken dream is still here...

Let the music play...

Words of the day:

"Time can never mend the careless whispers of a good friend
To the heart and mind, ignorance is kind
there's no comfort in the truth
pain is all you'll find

Should've known better

I feel so unsure
as I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
as the music dies, something in your eyes
calls to mind the silver screen
and all its sad good-byes

I'm never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

Should've known better than to cheat a friend
and waste the chance that I've been given
so I'm never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

Time can never mend
the careless whispers of a good friend
to the heart and mind
ignorance is kind
there's no comfort in the truth
pain is all you'll find

I'm never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

Should've known better than to cheat a friend
and waste this chance that I've been given
so I'm never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

Never without your love

Tonight the music seems so loud
I wish that we could lose this crowd
Maybe it's better this way
We'd hurt each other with the things we'd want to say

We could have been so good together
We could have lived this dance forever
But noone's gonna dance with me
Please stay

And I'm never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

Should've known better than to cheat a friend
and waste the chance that I've been given
so I'm never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

(Now that you're gone) Now that you're gone
(Now that you're gone) What I did's so wrong
that you had to leave me alone"

(George Michael, Careless whisper)

Something changed?

Wed, 19 Dec 2007 11:55:58 GMT

Today there's something new to see...

Changes sometimes are necessary, sometimes you need to change something to feel better...

I'm trying to change, I'm trying to be better every day... For me, for You all. This is my challange for the future...

But, first of all, before change something I have to understand what is wrong...

Words of the day:

"...That's just the way it is
Some things will never change
That's just the way it is
But don't you believe them..."

(Bruce Hornby, The Way It Is)

Wonderful sensation...

Sun, 16 Dec 2007 14:50:12 GMT

You took my head in your hands and shook it, You said "Don't worry, I'm here...", than You kissed me...

I was calm, relaxed, I could hear my breath and my heart was beating... A wonderful music was playing in the air... I was in heaven and all the problems suddenly disappered...

...But that was just a dream... Just a dream...

Words of the day:

"...If I can't have you when I'm waking
I'll go to sleep and dream of you..."

(Queen, Dreamer's Ball, Jazz)

Probably...

Sat, 08 Dec 2007 13:50:37 GMT

Probably is this cold blowing wind...

Probably is the desire to understand where I can find You...

Probably is the need to find my way...

Probably is this fear...

Probably is my strength...

Probably is this magic sound...

Probably is the music...

Probably is a dream...

Probably is a nightmare...

Probably is my reflection in a Window...

Probably is your smile...

Probably is this sadness...

Probably is this happiness...

Probably is this confusion...

Probably is this desire...

Probably is this beating heart...

Probably this is for me...

Probably this is for You...

Probably this is LOVE...

Rain must fall...

Fri, 23 Nov 2007 17:05:13 GMT

I'm thinking too much...

I have to stop blaming myself...

I have to...

Words of the day:

"My actions make me beautiful... And dignify the flesh..."

(R.E.M., Falls To Climb, UP)

....dekan dna derit

Wed, 14 Nov 2007 12:45:49 GMT

It's not so simple to show the best part of yourself when things are not going in the correct way...

It's not so simple to put feelings on a webpage...

It's not simple to be always yourself...

Unfortunately, you've succeeded in changing me...

Hey! You wanted me to be something that I will never be!

But one thing is true, even if this seems to be lost... I'm still able to LOVE...

My problem now is to understand how to show it to You!!!!

Please, help me...

Words of the day:

"So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep..."

(Soul Asylum, Runaway Train)

A picture...

Sun, 04 Nov 2007 13:03:18 GMT

Yesterday I was cleaning my bedroom and suddenly my eyes fell on a 4 years ago picture: The picture of my graduation in computer science. (And it was also the day of my 26th birthday!)

My friends made me a big surprise on that day... I didn't want to make any big party but they came to my home and arranged a wonderful evening!

What a wonderful moment!

Now most of them have their own family and children and we don't have so much time to stay together but we all remember the wonderful adventures we faced together... Our friendship was born and grew up in our oratory!

How many games we played, how many steps together, how many things we organized... How many lessons I've learnt from you, how many times I laugh with you... How many times you took my hands...

Thanks to all of you in that picture, and thanks to all the other friends that left (and will continue to leave) a footprint in my life...

Thanks to the OSL, the place in which we learnt how to love each other...

Words of the day:

"How can I forget
Those beautiful dreams that we shared..."

(Freddie Mercury & Montserrat Caballé, How Can I Go On, Barcelona)

Campioni del mondo!!!!!

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 18:04:10 GMT

The sky is Red...

The Italian flag is fluttering!

We are World Champions again!

Thanks Kimi, Felipe, and Team Ferrari!!!!

My heart is beating... and this is a very good starting point!

Words of the day:

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything"

(Mark Twain)

Let's start over...

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 09:49:17 GMT

I'm here again after a walk...

Now it's time to erase all memories, and restart again...

I'll try to be more positive, to trust again in myself... I know it will be not so simple, but I also know I can do it, maybe all the love I gave to others is not lost, maybe there's a small flame that is burning inside of me... It's only up to me to make this flame bigger and start again...

There're too many things happening around me, I would like to control them all but I'm not in the position to do that. It's a strange sensation, it seems I'm running in circle and it seems it's all for nothing...

Maybe your suggestion is a good starting point... I need to stop thinking so much and I need to start again using my heart instead of my brain...

But, there is only one thing that can help me to increase my hope and this thing is your smile...

I know, unfortunately, your smile is all that I can have, but I will be lost without it!

Thanks to be there...

Words of the day:

"L'uomo solo non esiste.

Non ci sono che uomini

legati gli uni agli altri,

fino ai limiti dell'umanità

e del tempo"

(Michel Quoist)

Where is it?

Wed, 17 Oct 2007 16:04:33 GMT

I'm feeling down today...

I have so many personal issues and I can't find a way to solve them...

I want to stay alone...

I don't want to ask for your help...

I feel like an empty bottle...

I need to re-fill myself...

The road I'm taking is not so clear... A lot of doubts are in my mind...

I never thought that this could happen to me...

I want to give you sunshine, but inside of me there's only darkness...

I need someone to talk to... but at the same time I don't want to tell anything...

I need a signal, a smile, to pull myself together 'cos in someway I know I should do better...

Please, catch me if I fall...

Thanks Matteo for your words...

Words of the day:

"Lord, I've been waiting all my life but I'm too late again I know,
But I was scared.
Can't you see,
Oh I'm moving like a train into some Foreign land..."

(Richard Ashcroft, A Song For The Lovers)

Hold my love or leave me high...

Sun, 14 Oct 2007 09:50:04 GMT

Goodmorning,

Now I'm still listening to the new R.E.M. double CD + DVD Live released on 12th of October.

Wonderful!

But yesterday, while I was listening, my attention fell to a 1998 song and I that's why I decided to put the complete lyrics here in my "Words of the day" section.

This song reminds me a part of my life... Who knows me well can confirm this.

So, if you want to have a look, read below...

Thanks again to Michael, Mike, Peter for these words...

Words of the day:

"As the sun comes up, as the moon goes down
These heavy notions creep around
It makes me think, long ago
I was brought into this life a little lamb
A little lamb
Courageous, stumbling
Fearless was my middle name.
But somewhere there I lost my way
Everyone walks the same
Expecting me to step
The narrow path they've laid
They claim to
Walk unafraid
I'll be clumsy instead
Hold my love or leave me high.

Say "keep within the boundaries if you want to play."
Say "contradiction only makes it harder."
How can I be
What I want To be?
When all I want to do is strip away
These stilled constraints
And crush this charade
Shred this sad masquerade
I don't need no persuading
I'll trip, fall, pick myself up and
Walk unafraid
I'll be clumsy instead
Hold my love or leave me high.

If I have a bag of rocks to carry as I go
I just want to hold my head up high
I don't care what I have to step over
I'm prepared to look you in the eye
Look me in the eye
And if you see familiarity
Then celebrate the contradiction
Help me when I fall to
Walk unafraid
I'll be clumsy instead
Hold my love or leave me high.
Walk unafraid
I'll be clumsy instead
Hold my love or leave me high."

(R.E.M., Walk Unafraid, Up)

I think I've lost my head!

Fri, 12 Oct 2007 15:20:33 GMT

Hi Dear Readers,

I will leave only a small post to say that today is a special day...

I'm tired, stressed, and I rolled the dice for the upcoming weekend...

I have the sensation that life is passing too fast and I'm still running in circle...

But one thing still true... You're still here... every day...

Words of the day:

"...There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how..."

(Oasis, Wanderwall)

Turin, 2/10/2007 - "...A butterfly trapped in a spider's web..."

Sat, 06 Oct 2007 07:52:46 GMT

I was there!

15 meters from the stage! A dream came true!

Sending this "message in a bottle"... looking for an "invisible sun", dreaming to be "wrapped around your finger" one day...

Thanks Guys...

Words of the day:

"...Devil and the deep blue sea behind me
Vanish in the air you'll never find me
I will turn your face to alabaster
When you will find your servant is your master..."

(The Police, Wrapped Around your Finger, Synchronicity)

Relax... Take It Easy...

Fri, 28 Sep 2007 13:48:16 GMT

Friday afternoon...

Another working week is coming to its end...

Like the last few weeks some high and low... Some smiles, some sadness, many thoughts in my head... Some friends that needed my help...

Some breaking news for my life...

Jesus! Life is bigger then us!

Many things to decide... I need to be more confident... this empasse will end... I hope soon...

Let's wait for the week-end.

Cya

Words of the day:

"...I can't live with you
But I can't live without you
I can't let you stay
Ooh but I can't live if you go away
I don't know just how it goes
All I know is I can't live with you..."

(Queen, I Can't Live With You, Innuendo)

J.N.

Mon, 24 Sep 2007 12:47:27 GMT

Just two words for today:

No Chance!

words of the day:

"...How could I be this way when I pray to God above
I must love what I destroy and destroy the thing I love
Oh you'll never see my shade or hear the sound of my feet..."

(Sting, Moon Over Bourboun Street)

Another little piece...

Sat, 22 Sep 2007 16:09:26 GMT

I don' t have so much time...

But I would like to use these few minutes only to write the following words...

...Today another piece of the puzzle has been added...

Have a nice week-end.

Words of the day:

"...But time is the space,
Between me and you..."

(Seal, Prayer For The Dying)

This is for you...

Thu, 20 Sep 2007 16:00:48 GMT

Just thinking...

The following song reminds you...

A big kiss... Only for you...

"Smile, without a reason why
Love, as if you were a child
Smile, no matter what they tell you
Don’t listen to a word they say
'Cause life is beautiful that way

Tears, a tidal-wave of tears
Light that slowly disappears
Wait, before you close the curtain
There’s still another game to play
And life is beautiful that way

Here, in his eyes forever more
I will always be as close as you remember from before.

Now, that you're out there on your own
Remember, what is real and what we dream is love alone.

Keep the laughter in your eyes
Soon, your long awaited prize
We'll forget about our sorrow
And think about a brighter day
'Cause life is beautiful that way

We'll forget about our sorrow
And think about a brighter day
'Cause life is beautiful that way

There’s still another game to play
And life is beautiful that way"

(Nicola Piovani/Noa & Gil Dor, Beautiful That Way, Life is Beautiful Soundrack)

Look at this... It's me...

Mon, 17 Sep 2007 15:45:52 GMT

I'm here... Again...

I don't drink coffee so my working break is here...

I know, maybe this blog is becoming a little bit boring for most of you...

Maybe is the English language... maybe it is too sad... I don't know... Maybe you don't like music... Maybe you want to laugh...

As you can see, I like to talk using a lot of song's lyrics; a lot of secret messages are hidden here, and everything here is telling a story... The story of my life...

Maybe, someone has already found them, maybe they will remain buried between these few rows... forever...

But one thing is true, only who knows me very well has a chance to fully understand my words...

Take care...

Words of the day:

"So chi sono io
anche se non ho letto Freud.
So come sono fatto io
ma non riesco a sciogliermi
ed è per questo che son qui..."

(Samuele Bersani, Spaccacuore)

Let the music play...

Wed, 05 Sep 2007 13:45:02 GMT

How do I feel today?

The answer is below...

"I'm just the pieces of the man I used to be
Too many bitter tears are raining down on me
I'm far away from home
And I've been facing this alone
For much too long
I feel like no-one ever told the truth to me
About growing up and what a struggle it would be
In my tangled state of mind
I've been looking back to find
Where I went wrong
Too much love will kill you
If you can't make up your mind
Torn between the lover
And the love you leave behind
You're headed for disaster
'cos you never read the signs
Too much love will kill you
Every time
I'm just the shadow of the man I used to be
And it seems like there's no way out of this for me
I used to bring you sunshine
Now all I ever do is bring you down
How would it be if you were standing in my shoes
Can't you see that it's impossible to choose
No there's no making sense of it
Every way I go I'm bound to lose
Too much love will kill you
Just as sure as none at all
It'll drain the power that's in you
Make you plead and scream and crawl
And the pain will make you crazy
You're the victim of your crime
Too much love will kill you
Every time
Too much love will kill you
It'll make your life a lie
Yes, too much love will kill you
And you won't understand why
You'd give your life, you'd sell your soul
But here it comes again
Too much love will kill you
In the end...
In the end."

(Queen, Too Much Love Will Kill You, Made In Heaven)

Playing With Words....

Fri, 31 Aug 2007 19:19:41 GMT

Well, I'm here again... Me and this white page...

I don't know exaclty why I decided to post today, 'cos the whirlwind is in my head and the words are mixed up..

Strange sensation is catching me and the result is this post...

Haze came back and now I can't see welll...

Everything seemed clear to me before today, but now I still have some difficult to understand myself...

Sometimes is not so simple to find the way, and it seems today I've lost it once again...

Words of the day:

"And the plants are dry and they need to drink.
So you do your best. and you flood the sink.
Sit down in the kitchen and cry."

(R.E.M., Aftermath, Around The Sun")

Back from the Highlands...

Tue, 28 Aug 2007 13:25:35 GMT

Finally I'm back...

Unfortunately I'm back...

Back From the Highlands...

Back From Scotland...

Wonderful landscapes...

Castles, Abbeys and ancient history...

I've found another piece of myself in those days... I felt like a knight fighting for his life...

Thanks to Tiz, Ale, Massi for this wonderful adventure...

This is a picture I'd like to give you... Me, looking for the future in the land of Highlanders...

Words of the day:

"Every man dies. Not every man really lives..."

(William Wallace)

Searching for myself...

Thu, 09 Aug 2007 19:50:09 GMT

-1 day to my holiday...

-1 day to Scotland...

-1 day to a new adventure...

My heart is ready... What I want is try to find myself again and make my soul immortal...

So, I prepared my sword and I'm ready to fight...

Highlands, I'm approaching!

Words of the day:

"I am Connor MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod. I was born in 1518 in the village of Glenfinnan on the shores of Loch Shiel. And I am immortal...

...There can be only one..."

(Highlander, The movie)

Confessions to myself...

Wed, 08 Aug 2007 11:00:31 GMT

It's a lot of time that I don't put a word on this board. Maybe it is because I don't want to publish my feelings. The situation is tricky, I think I have a lot of thoughts and I think I need to have some peace for me.

I don't know exaclty why, but I'm angry with this world, loneliness is part of me... My house is growing up but it's hard to say it: it will be empty... I think a part of me is still missed and I'm waiting for someone who's able to complete it... I think I would like to start again with somebody new but I still don't have the courage. What a stupid reaction! Instead of trying to start an approach I'm hiding and I hide my feelings and my job is a good mask!

Maybe this is because I'm scared and I don't want to lose again, to suffer again, and I don't want to discover that feelings are not the same on both sides!

Jesus! It's so simple to say things with an email, an SMS, but is not the same to tell what you feel, looking a person in the eyes!

Call me coward, call me whatever you want, but It's hard to break this cover... considered my past experience...

So, this is my confession, I don't know whether or not it is good to put my feelings here, but I think it will help me to unload the rage that is in me...

Sorry guys if I bored you... I didn't want pity... But I needed this... This is ME... Today...

Words of the day:

"On and on the rain will fall
Like tears from a star like tears from a star
On and on the rain will say
How fragile we are how fragile we are".

(Sting, Fragile, Nothing Like The Sun)

Something to forget...

Fri, 03 Aug 2007 15:47:40 GMT

Tired and confused!

That's all.

Words of the day:

"...Ain't no angel gonna greet me
It's just you and I my friend
My clothes don't fit me no more
I walked a thousand miles
Just to slip the skin..."

(Bruce Springsteen, Streets of Philadelphia)

Unit NEXUS6 Roy Batty N6MAA10816 Ment.LEV A

Wed, 25 Jul 2007 18:53:38 GMT

Tonight I feel strange and a little bit down...

It seems I do so much for everyone, but nothing remains for me... I feel Like an empty glass... I'm tired...

I'm running, maybe fighting more than I should even if I'm not at the top... But for what? I can't uderstand people that pretends only and don't understand that everyone has different time... We are not replicant... Maybe we have to change our point of view... Maybe we have to change our strategy...

That's all for this evening... Goodnight.

Words of the day:

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."

(Blade Runner)

The power of words...

Mon, 23 Jul 2007 15:44:17 GMT

Can someone lend me some words for today?

As usual, there's a storm in my mind but I can't put words together...

Ok, it means I will steal them from the music...

Thanks Sting, Stewart and Andy... October is still far but will come soon...

"Don't think me unkind
Words are hard to find
They're only cheques I've left unsigned
From the banks of chaos in my mind
And when their eloquence escapes me
Their logic ties me up and rapes me

De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
Their innocence will pull me through
De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
They're meaningless and all that's true

Poets, priests and politicians
Have words to thank for their positions
Words that scream for your submission
And no-one's jamming their transmission
And when their eloquence escapes you
Their logic ties you up and rapes you

De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
Their innocence will pull me through
De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
They're meaningless and all that's true

De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
Their innocence will pull me through
De do do do, de da da da
Is all I want to say to you
De do do do, de da da da
They're meaningless and all that's true"

(The Police, De do do do, de da da da, Zenyatta Mondatta)

Let's begin again...

Sat, 21 Jul 2007 14:45:33 GMT

Hi my Friends,

Finally, yesterday my left arm returned to freedom... The plaster-cast has been finally removed... But the reparing process in my left elbow is still in progress and I have to be very careful in order to avoid further damages...

Unfortunately, it hurts so much and I have to be very patient when I try to make it work in the correct way. Of course, I cannot extend my arm like I want, and I still have many limits... But you know, sometimes "Pain is so close to pleasure", you have to suffer a bit to feel good!

So I have a lot exercises to do, and like a child, my arm has to learn how to do things...

It will be another small challenge, and it will be another lesson for me. In the last few weeks I learned how important is my left arm! ;)

It is really true... We understand how important things are, only when we miss them!

Life is always a lesson, and You teach me everyday something new!

This is amazing... Don't You think?

Cheers.

Words of the day:

"... let the rain fall on your skin

I come to you defences down

with the trust of a child..."

(Peter Gabriel, Red Rain)

Faces...

Thu, 19 Jul 2007 16:53:13 GMT

I'm just thinking about the people around me...

I see all the faces in front of me even if I close my eyes...

Sometimes I would like to embrace some of them and try to explain how I feel... But in most of the cases I don't want to feel like an idiot... I'm scared on their possible reaction...

Yes, I'm talking also to You... Maybe one day I will tell You everything...

But I hope it will be not too late...

A Kiss...

Words of the day:

"...When I look on your eyes then I find that I'll do fine.
When I look on your eyes then I'll do better..."

(The Connels, '74 - '75)

.... .. -.. -.. . -. / -- . ... ... .- --. . .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.-

Tue, 10 Jul 2007 13:10:55 GMT

.--- ..- ... - / .- / ... .... --- .-. - / -- . ... ... .- --. . / ..-. --- .-. / -.-- --- ..- / .- .-.. .-.. .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.- / .-..-. - .... .- -. -.- / -.-- --- ..- / ..-. --- .-. / -... . / .... . .-. . / -. --- .-- / ..-. --- .-. / -- . / - .... .- -. -.- / -.-- --- ..- / ..-. --- .-. / .-.. .. ... - . -. .. -. --. .-..-. / --. --- --- -.. -... -.-- .

Words of the day:

"...What is essential is invisible to the eye..."

(Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince)

Breathe...

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 16:56:36 GMT

Just came back from a walk in the field of my small town...

I saw many real smiles on faces...

I saw children playing and greeting me...

I saw teenagers taking children hands and playing with them...

How many sweet memories in my mind! Suddenly the clock turned back to some years ago...

I closed my eyes, and I took a deep breath... I could smell all the parfumes of past... Memories flowed like a film... What a wonderful sensation!

This is what I love... I love simplicity... I love simple smiles... I love simple actions...

I think I also love you... Even if you don't know!

Words of the day:

"...Breathe your honesty
Breathe your innocence to me
Breathe your word and set me free
Breathe to make me breathe..."

(Midge Ure, Breathe)

Numb3rs...

Sat, 07 Jul 2007 07:09:21 GMT

Goodmorning!

Did you check today's date?

07/07/07

I'm not superstitious, I don't trust in "Cabala" but I have a lot of sweet memories related to number 7...

I don't want to bore you with them, but 7 is one of the most important number for the human race... So, do your search to understand why...

Ok, let's start this new day and let's hope to add it to the list of the past good days linked to number 7...

See you soon...

P.S. For those who like music, today there will be a 24 hours concert for the climate crisis. So, if you want to know more about this event you can go to http://www.liveearth.org/. Enjoy!

Words of the day:

"...It's not a second
7 seconds away
Just as long as I stay
I'll be waiting..."

(Youssou N'Dour feat. Neneh Cherry, Seven Seconds)

Black out...

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 18:41:23 GMT

Just few words to say "I'm sorry"...

I'm sorry with all the persons I met today if I was not able to give them a smile...

I'm a little bit nervous in this period and this is not good for the people around me... And they don't deserve it!

So, I think I have to stay alone for a while and search again for my peace...

Now, let's start opening the cd-player tray and put in a disc... The disc of my life...

See you somewhere...

Words of the day:

"...Please believe me
Every word I say is true
Please forgive me..."

(Brian Adams, Please Forgive me)

Fight from the inside...

Sat, 30 Jun 2007 07:44:53 GMT

Dear Friends,

I feel tired, I didn't sleep well in the last few days, and I feel like a Champagne bottle, ready to explode...

I have a lot of feelings that I would like to show but my brain is telling me that is not the case...

I know well that most of them are impossible dreams, and this is not the most lucky period to add other worries to my life...

So, let's continue in this way, let's keep up this mask, and savour every mouthful, every sight, every smile... this will remind me again how beautyful life is...

Thanks my friends to be by my side... One day this bottle will be opened, and you'll decide if the Champagne inside is good or not!

Words of the day:

"...It's a little bit funny this feeling inside

I'm not one of those who can easily hide..."

(Elton John, Your Song)

You're offering things I've never dreamed...

Wed, 27 Jun 2007 16:22:36 GMT

With one hand only is more difficult to put something on this blog...

But the only thing I want to say today is "Thank you!" to all the people who sent me some messages and called me to wish me the best for my broken arm. Some of them are really really really special and words are not enough to say how I love them...

So, thanks to all...

Words of the day:

"Tu sei solo, e lo sai.

Tu sei nato per vivere

sotto le ali di un altro,

sorretto e giustificato da un altro...

...non basti da solo, e lo sai."

(C. Pavese)

Broken arm...

Mon, 25 Jun 2007 10:59:48 GMT

Hello my friends,

I have big difficults to write this post 'cos yesterday I've broken my left arm!

Let me briefly describe how it happend...

It was almost 16.00 CET and I was playing soccer with my friends, after 15 minutes only I tumbled like an idiot and my left elbow made an innatural torsion...

The result is that I have to keep this plaster-cast for one month! So, I have to forget for the next weeks some planned adventures...

Maybe I have to take care of the suggestion of some friends...

I'm getting old, and it's better to play checkers instead of playing soccer on Sunday afternoon!

This is a really unlucky period for me... I think I have to book a trip to Lourdes!!!

See you!

Words of the day:

"...I'll be lazing on a Sunday afternoon..."

(Queen, Lazing On Sunday Afternoon, A Night At The Opera)

You might have succeeded in changing me...

Fri, 22 Jun 2007 13:35:02 GMT

Hi Guys,

Just few words in today's post...

First of all, a special thanks to Veronica... She knows why ;)

And then, something for you, dear readers... Today there's one song that is whirling in my mind...

So, if you want... listen to it!

Below, you'll find the lyrics.

Enjoy...

Leaving New York

It's quiet now
And what it brings
Is everything

Comes calling back
A brilliant night
I'm still awake

I looked ahead
I'm sure I saw you there

You don't need me
To tell you now
That nothing can compare

You might have laughed if I told you
You might have hidden A frown
You might have succeeded in changing me
I might have been turned around

It's easier to leave than to be left behind
Leaving was never my proud
Leaving New York, never easy
I saw the light fading out

Now life is sweet
And what it brings
I tried to take
But loneliness
It wears me out
It lies in way

And all not lost
Still in my eyes
The shadow of necklace
Across your thigh
I might've lived my life in a dream, but I swear
This is real
Memory fuses and shatters like glass
Mercurial future, forget the past
It's you, it's what I feel.

You might have laughed if I told you (it's pulling me apart)
You might have hidden a frown (change)
You might have succeeded in changing me (it's pulling me apart)
I might have been turned around (change)

It's easier to leave than to be left behind (it's pulling me apart)
Leaving was never my proud (change)
Leaving New York, never easy (it's pulling me apart)
I saw the light fading out
You find it in your heart, it's pulling me apart
You find it in your heart, change...

I told you, forever
I love you, forever
I told you, I love you
I love you, forever
I told you, forever
You never, you never
You told me forever

You might have laughed if I told you
You might have hidden the frown
You might have succeeded in changing me
I might have been turned around

It's easier to leave than to be left behind (it's pulling me apart)
Leaving was never my proud (change)
Leaving New York never easy (it's pulling me apart)
I saw the life fading out (change)
Leaving New York, never easy (it's pulling me apart)
I saw the light fading out (change)
Leaving New York never easy (it's pulling me apart)
I saw the life fading out (change)

(R.E.M. Leaving New York, Around The Sun)

Alone is better?

Thu, 21 Jun 2007 16:05:38 GMT

Hi my friends!

Another working day is coming to its end... What I learned today is that sometimes alone is better...

Sometimes you have to use your brain and knowledge without involving other people... This make you more confident...

But this is not always true... Many times the need of a people on your side raises... This can help when you're down...

I'm still searching... I'm still waiting... I'm still fighting...

One day the battle will finish...

Cya

Words of the day:

"...I'll send an s.o.s. to the world
I hope that someone gets my
Message in a bottle..."

(The Police, Message In A Bottle)

Was it all worth it?

Wed, 20 Jun 2007 12:15:48 GMT

Hi Guys,

I'm back... but I still have a lack of inspiration so I don't know exactly how to say what is in my mind...

I'm running running running but I have the impression to go in the wrong direction and the goal is still not so clear...

My trust in some people is downgraded... I thought I knew them but I was totally wrong... I think I have to raise another wall...

I also have the feeling that love is near but I can't catch it...

Anyway, I'm only sure of one thing... I can get down on my knees and pray! Fortunately, He is able to listen to me...

Ok! now it's time to lunch, it's time to take a long breathe, it's time to start believing again in myself... Let's see...

Talk to you soon...

Words of the day:

"...A gentleman will walk but never run..."

(Sting, Englishman in New York, Nothing Like The Sun)